I often get asked about phone usage now that cell phone technology has come so far and seems to invade us at every turn. For calling times I follow the guidelines that were initially set up by the Federal Trade Commission that state acceptable phone usage is from 8am to 9pm. Although these times were intended for adherence by telemarketers they apply in our personal lives as well. Business of course is different and should be restricted to the normal business hours of 8am to 6pm however as businesses evolve you may find that your clients will expect differently. It is wise to ask during your initial contact to make sure what times are appropriate for them.

Technology can either work for or against us depending on how we choose to utilize it. There are 6.1 billion voice minutes used every day as cited by The Wireless Association so it stands to reason that good phone manners will get you farther in today’s busy world.

Because of caller id people sometimes assume it is not necessary to introduce themselves which has a casual connotation which may not be the avenue you should take. Set the stage for success in all that you do, let the receiver know who is calling.

When using your phone in a public space speak softly so not to disturb those around you. Never use your phone when standing in line, in a movie, at the doctors, in a library, a place of worship, in an elevator, a restaurant, in a meeting or seminar. If you do need to use your phone in a public space it is best to keep 10 feet of space between you and others using your quiet voice.

Ear pieces were created to be used in a vehicle where you should be hands free. Don’t walk around talking on it in a public space like a crazy person, leave it in the car. It’s inappropriate to leave your ear piece in while meeting with someone as it gives the impression that you are not fully engaged with the person in front of you. Be present in all that you do.

Call waiting is just that. It is a call that you get to decide to pick up or not. Unless you are expecting an important call while in the presence of someone else, let it go to voicemail. If you are expecting an urgent call let the person you are with know in advance of your anticipated call so they are aware of this possible interruption otherwise turn the ringer off and put your phone away. If you must take the call excuse yourself and step away or better yet leave the room and be as brief as possible.

I can not stress enough about the importance of putting your phone away and being present with someone. Building relationships takes time and your attention. When you are distracted by your phone ringing or vibrating it breaks you concentration and your connection with the person that is in front of you. Respect other people’s time. Last week a sales rep came into my office to propose that I use the products he had to offer. During our meeting with his cell phone (pacifier which I often refer to them as) attached to his hip, his phone began to vibrate. He immediately picked it up, looked at it, put it back on his belt and kept talking. This happened several other times during our meeting until finally I just asked him to leave. If you want someone’s business then build the relationship, be with them and find out their business needs so that you can provide the appropriate tools to help them. Be a good partner to the person you wish to do business with. You only get one chance to make a first impression.

If you use your favorite song for your ring tone be sure to keep your phone in a place where you can pick it up quickly. People should not have to listen to your genre of music while you dig for your phone or decide if you will accept the call or not.

Statistics say that 2 to 4 out of every 100 calls placed is dropped. If you were the one to initiate  the call and it drops, for whatever reason, it is your responsibility to place the call again. Always apologize for the inconvenience and then move on to finishing your conversation.

As for taking pictures with your phone, always ask permission, never assume someone wants their photo taken and publicized to the world.

As our world changes so goes etiquette providing courtesy, style and respect at every turn. When in doubt keep the Golden Rule in mind.

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Of course, being grateful for someone’s gift of time, a gift you received, a gift of money or just someone’s kind words are all perfect reasons to send another person a hand written note. When writing a thank you note always mention the gift and what you intend to do with the gift or how the gift will improve your life. For instance: Thank you for the coffee maker, I will think of you every morning as Joe brings me coffee in bed. He will bring me coffee in bed, won’t he? Speaking in a hand written note really makes it more personal. Take the time to pour your heart out as your pen glides across the paper.

Sending a hand written note is a great way to let someone know they are appreciated and that you are thinking of them and only them right at that moment. How perfect is that!

Personalized products such as personalized stationery or note cards can be printed with your unique monogram or set of initials. There is an easy way to distinguish between the two of them and each have there own set of rules.

When initials are printed on something whether stationery, tote bags, etc. the letters are all the same size. They can have a period placed between each letter or not and the initials follow in the same manner as your name; first, middle and last name.

The initials in this picture would represent a name of: William Thomas Holmes or this is also acceptable for a woman: Wendy Taylor Holmes

Monograms on the other hand have a larger letter in the middle. This letter represents the persons last name. To the left of this letter is the first name and to the right of this letter is the middle name. Over the past year’s it has become acceptable to use this form of letters as a husband and wife or I should say wife and husband as in social stationery the wife always comes first.

Here are some examples: Paula Dean Perot is a name that this monogram would represent. If on the other hand this were for a husband and wife the names may be: Paula and Dave Perot.

Thinking of a unique way to POP the question? Take a look….
URDB – Longest Whisper Chain

Shared via AddThis
People seem to be getting more and more creative these days. Take a look at how Jake Bronstein not only broke the record for the longest whisper chain but also happened to get engaged at the same time. The wedding entrance and the marriage proposal will never be the same.

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Ask Merry Tip: Set yourself apart, after an interview always send a handwritten thank you note immediately to the interviewer.

Ask Merry Tip:Sending mass text messages is only appropriate for life changing occasions.Be mindful of other peoples time and never abuse it

Ask Merry Etiquette: Did you know that emails can be considered as legal documents? Watch what you write. Do you have an etiquette dilemma?

A few quick tips to assist you in being successful with social media.  For some of you these suggestions may seem ordinary or suggestions that you already know and implement, however for others the thought that what you put up on the internet stays forever is a thought that never crosses their mind or that only my friends and family will see this, so who cares? Well, beware…big brother is watching. In many cases within a human resources department it is becoming standard practice to “google” prospective employees before hiring them as well as to “google” their current employees to make sure they have the best possible person for the job. Always put your best foot forward.

Today’s tips:

• Do not use social media to pitch your company.  Social media is about relationships.  Provide value added service and the business will come.  Always think about what you are giving back or paying forward when embarking on relationships.  You will create WIN-WIN opportunities.
• Social media relationships are two way. Each person has to contribute just as in any relationship. So don’t start one or accept one if you do not intend to keep it.
• When commenting on blogs, use your real name.  Be upfront about who you are.
• Watch your language and how you refer to others.
• Never write in capital letters, it is considered shouting.
• Avoid doing group invites, unless each person you are inviting is someone you wish to correspond with. This is not a numbers game.  Connect with others when their is something in common or relevant.
• Do not assume the other person understands your abbreviations. The messages you send should reflect your writing style and be a reflection of who you are.
• Respect people’s time, we all are busy.

I hope this has put some of your social media etiquette questions to rest.  There is so much more to discuss about this every changing topic. I look forward to exploring it with you.